Struggle with a muddle
Gloria Spark:
Gloria Spark draws on over twenty years of reading the problem pages in namely; the Reader’s Digest, Women’s Own and CHAT magazine placed very neatly in the exact centre of the table in her doctors waiting room. She feels what could have been a significantly long wait, was made more interesting ‘flicking’ through and reflecting on other people’s woes. Gloria is instantly familiar with many of the ‘problems’ presented, because they resonate deeply on a very personal level, as she has experienced many of them herself. Therefore, because of she feels she is able to articulate warmth and extraordinarily empathic advice and guidance.
We asked 2 readers to write in to Gloria with ‘muddles they were struggling with, and to follow the her advice if they wanted to>
Question 1:
My dear Gloria, I am hoping beyond hope that you are able to give me some of your inner strength and wisdom. I am a 67 year young, single woman. I have my own house and business. I keep myself fit and active. I used to follow a strict vegetarian diet until very recently, when I became a beanarian, and I NEVER go shopping without a jolly good supply of bags for life! But I am at my wits end with worry and anxiety that I might be pregnant. If I am, I just don’t know what I’ll do. It will totally ruin my reputation, credibility and business as a Yoga instructor. I just can’t fathom out how I have ended up in this position. I can only guess that it happened when the class were practicing unlocking their inner potential through life-changing exercises. When I noticed a client hadn’t got into the correct position for the Camel Pose, I asked her to try the Cobra Pose instead and follow this by the Cat and Cow while focusing on her deep breathing techniques throughout. Unfortunately, she still had difficulty, so I lay down on the mat next to her so we could go through the poses together. This was going really well until the clients’ deep breathing suddenly turned into what is known in yoga circles as the ‘breath of fire’! She suddenly did a downward facing dog pose and her breath of fire was getting louder and louder. I felt myself getting hotter and hotter and couldn’t concentrate or restrain myself any longer. I felt my own breathing was matching hers - breath by breath. Literally, out of nowhere I found myself in a downward dog pose, and now I think I’m pregnant. - Pauline 67yrs - Plymouth
Answer 1:
I can’t believe this. This is absolutely incredible ! I had EXACTLY the same thing happen to me! Well, when I say exactly, what I mean is it was near enough. I had also become a very strict beanarian: beans for breakfast, lunch and dinner, and in between, snacking on dried figs, banana and apple and just the same as you Pauline. I did twice daily yoga exercises (we could be twins I hear you say) and so like you my dear friend, my stomach became bigger and bigger. I have therefore focused my daily yoga meditations on your situation and I now give you my wise words of wisdom. Before doing anything else please try the following yoga position called ‘Pawanmuktasana’ (pronounced as PUH-vuhn-mukt-AAHS-uh-num) or gas release pose. This definitely worked for me. I was so full of wind after a whole month of eating pulses morning noon and night, I could have generated enough methane to power the whole of the midlands and beyond. If this fails to relieve you and put your mind in a peaceful position, the Pound Shop do have pregnancy testing kits for a pound which is truly amazing because it is a pound shop _ Namaste 🙏
Question 2:
Dear Gloria, I need to share something that is giving me sleepless nights and stressful days, and while I am struggling writing a letter to a problem page, I feel its my only option. I hope you realise I am writing this with a sad heart. I would be lying if I said I had not hoped for my relationship to work out. I sincerely believed that it would, but I have come to realise that it has to end and has to end soon, before I convince myself that he is the one for me. Yet, over the past few months, I have come to realise that we have to split up. We don’t see each other eye to eye as often as I think we need to, in order for this relationship to work and I realise I need the warmth of human touch and conversation. The advice I need Gloria, is how to split up with him without totally knocking his confidence. You see Gloria, he works in the arts, well in fact he is an actor, who like many actors has a very fragile sense of self. He works for a independent studio in Leicester. - Sue Blu
Answer 2:
Poor you Sue Blu, Ive done some research and if I am correct, which I usually am, I’m guessing the name of the studio is PallattWood Studio, based in a back bedroom in Leicester. I’m not going to wait for you to confirm this, as reading between the lines I think I’ve hit the bullseye! I am hoping you are sitting down while reading this as you are in for one mighty shock ! Sue, you have been dating a toy Action Man. He is not real. This is why you don’t see eye to eye or have the warmth of human contact and conversation. So, don’t worry about his confidence being knocked, he’s not real, he’s plastic, no feelings, nothing, nada ! Just name a price and put him on eBay or a more appropriate website for you would be ‘Pre-Loved. I hope you find my advice helpful Sue Blu.
For no fuss, practical and emotional advice to any muddles or struggles you may have please Email: PallattWoodStudio@Bedlum.co.uk